And once I got my head around that, I was a lot calmer. We did what we could, when we could. Then we made an effort to do things as a family. Baking, planting, going for walks, movie nights etc. It wasn’t all done with the enthusiasm I’d hoped for, but we all appreciated it. 

With a seven year age gap between my boys, I was really challenged to look at how I helped them get through this time of uncertainty. They were (and still are) at very different stages of life – one in reception and one just tasting the freedom and independence of high school. From how we spoke to them about the pandemic situation, to the emotional or educational support, it had to be different. When one wanted a long, tight cuddle, the other wanted some time alone. One needed to run around aimlessly to let off steam, the other found solace in computer games and WhatsApp conversations. Whilst I might not have loved some of those options, I had to embrace the fact these were the coping mechanisms my kids used.  

To add to this, not only were we living through the most bizarre period in a generation, we then had to navigate parenthood in the aftermath of the murder of George Floyd. I cried for him, I cried for my children and every black mother that heard this man call for his mum while his life was being squeezed out of him.  

Bringing up black boys, I’ve always been mindful of the additional challenges of raising them in a world that doesn’t seem them as equals, but when there’s a spotlight on racism during an already emotionally challenging time, it added even more emotional strain. More sensitive conversations, more emotional support. But looking back, it's been positive for the children to see their parents having difficult conversations and trying to make a difference.  

It really was the craziest, most emotionally charged period of my life. But we learnt a lot from it.  

Have there been easy/positive aspects of lockdown? 

We survived! Having spent every single day and night together for over a year, we are still here, together as a family and we don’t hate each other.  

We knew it at the time, but we are more appreciative of how lucky we are to have a house and our own garden – lockdown for us was probably much easier than it was for many other people.   

I’ve had to make an effort find ways to bond with my pre-teen, which has resulted in our regular MCU film and tv nights.  

Have there been difficult/negative aspects of lockdown?  

Knowing that we weren’t able to visit friends and family who live nearby was really difficult. Having not grown up with my own grandma nearby, I’ve always felt so lucky that my boys could see their g-ma regularly. So losing this precious time with her was very hard.  

It's been difficult missing out on other family birthdays, celebrations and chances to see some of the older members of our family.  

Lack of space! Yes, I love my family, but sometimes you just want to spend time with different humans and talk about different things.  

Has your work been affected?  

I actually started a new job in December! It was definitely a risk, but I knew it was what I wanted and needed. With the year we’d had, I wanted to show my children that you have to make the most of opportunities that are presented to you. You never know what tomorrow might hold, so seize the day.   

Doing an interview on your bed, with a 5 year old shouting from the other side of the door isn’t an ideal situation, but it worked for me!  

What has helped you get through lockdown?  

Aside from a subscription to Naked Wines (don’t judge me), I’d say exercise. This probably sounds really cheesy, but finding time most mornings to workout at home, gave me energy for the day ahead, a chance to clear my head and time to do something for myself. I not only feel physically stronger, but emotionally stronger too.  

Having a husband who is much more rational and less emotional than me has also helped. He adds a dose of realism when my imagination runs away with me.  

Have you learnt anything, during lockdown, that you will want carry forward as it is eased? Are there things that you might even miss? 

I’ve realised, no matter how old, we all appreciate a bit of certainty and structure. That’s probably what made much of the last year so difficult, uncertainty. I’ve definitely been reminded of the importance of establishing some consistency in our life amongst all of the changes going on outside. And as a mother it was my responsibility to do that. Not to say we stuck to a fixed routine every day, far from it, but we tried to create some quasi structure which I hope they appreciated.   

I’ve learnt its ok to slow down. Life is busy. So many hobbies and activities to fill up the weekends and evenings, but its fine to have a break from them sometimes to focus on quality time with people and things you care about.  

I think we are all going to make more of an effort to spend time with the people that are important to us. It’s a cliché but I do believe this past year will genuinely make people look at what is important to them. For me, it's spending time with my loved ones.  

We’ll carry on playing board games on a Sunday evening, watching films together on rainy afternoons and just hanging out together.